For most of my life, I have struggled with visibility. Although I do not mind being in the spotlight, I do not want to have all eyes fixed on me at all times. As an introvert, I like my company and being alone. I enjoy observing without being seen. Moreover, I understand that I am far from perfection and that public attention and scrutiny may expose my fragility and flaws. I am not just talking about physical attributes, but about the internal, emotional, and psychological defects and shame that make me want to hide from the fear of being ridiculed and rejected. So I limit my exposure and visibility to the world at a minimum.
Clearly, my thoughts contradict the modern age of selfie and Instagram models and aspiring stars who document all their actions and events in pictures and videos. As I watch this phenomenon, I observe a narcissistic culture in desperate need of instant fame and attention. Perhaps they are all extroverts and are validated by external attention or are succumbing to peer pressure and a misconception that fame will make everything better? Growing in the public eye with video and photographic records of everything that you are doing will remain with you at perpetuity. As you grow older and mature, there will be incidents that you will wish that you could remove. There are mistakes that I have made in my youth that I am glad are not recorded. Thank God I grew up in an age where people did not own smartphones.
I also happen to remember a past life where I was an important public figure. Although history is kind to this leader, I can categorically say that there were abuse of power and failings. Yes, he brought some radical concepts to the civilized world, but I am struggling to reconcile the failings. My reluctance to embrace a public presence in this lifetime comes from my fears of repeating the same mistakes. This thought pattern is irrational because I am not the same person. I have grown and I am now more mature. During this lifetime, I am disabling this major self-sabotaging program and will continue the transformative work that I had started in that past lifetime.
If you remain in the shadow for too long, you blend with the darkness and your footprint disappears. No matter how private you are, there comes a point in the evolutionary process where growth can only occur if you are sharing what you have learned and assimilated. You can only keep what you are willing to give away. Moreover, the Universe gives you what you need and not what you want. Since I need to teach, the Universe has given me access to more information. Without my students, I would not have mastered what I know.
There is a difference between private and public content. I believe that many individuals are oversharing on public media. There is intimate information that is kitchen table conversation that needs to remain private and other personal information that one can share in the spirit of being an example to others. Even how that sharing happens has to be controlled by the person doing the sharing. Every individual must use discretion when sharing information to the world. Remember to manage your visibility and be selective in revealing information about yourself with the world.
After years of work on my personal growth and ascension, I have realized that my vulnerabilities are not weaknesses. They are superpowers. By removing my blind spots and becoming aware of my fragile and breakable points, I can continue to let them exist in the shadow or choose to expose them to the world. If I can find the courage to show the world my vulnerabilities, I will liberate myself from a cycle of shame and secrecy, and become a champion for thousands of others who are holding the same level of shame and are suffering in silence from fear of being fractured and broken. Now I will become the voice that will help them heal from toxic cycles of complicit silence and denial.
The operative principle here is that I have to work my way into being comfortable and OK with sharing my flaw with the world. It is not a race and there is no expectation to reveal myself to the world by a specific date. Slowly, I must remove my blind spots and then acknowledge the flaws in the first place. What I do with that information is a personal and individual choice.
My choice is not going to be your choice. After years of work on myself and realizing that my personal experience can become a learning tool for my students, I typically end up sharing with my circle of influence. I have found this to be a powerful teaching tool. Rather than speak about abstraction and dry spiritual and ascension principles, I illustrate my teachings with my own personal examples.
What you keep private and what you reveal to the world is your choice. Hiding everything and allowing the world to see a perfect and cultivated persona is inauthentic. Projecting that perfect image to the world will soon seep inward. You will begin to forget who you are and believe that the lie is authentic. If you are seeking liberation from a life of self-deceit, you need to connect to your internal fragility. Stop trying to be perfect and realize that you are human and imperfect. You must be embrace your humanity before you can become Divine.
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